independence is great test of the mind and body. looking at my future practice, opportunities in my daily life seem distant horizons. my hands reach out now to grasp your guidance. the muscles teach me patience as i generate intention. knowledge has potential. in my day, having planted intention, i work on growing action. in the morning everyone has coffee. i have sounds. normally i like to turn on multimedia sources of sound- my tv, ipad, and computer. the regular, predictable dialogues help me attune my hearing. i become awake and recognize my auditory channel. mom yells at me to turn off the cacaphony. i decrease the volume however i make note of my will to hear sounds.i hear the buzzing sound of electricity, the internet humming, and the air conditioning whooshing as its turned on. data generates sound too, like my frequencies of rice eating in my mouth, breathing in and out thru my nose, and the words that beg to hide in my head. in surrounding environment is the sound of real people- their daily prep, recessed verbal exclamations, and mechanical noises of the microwave operating. its breakfast. time to wake up to a new day in autism.
making decision to continue my education is human right. despite the obstacles i study online every day. having autism is tough but i am persistence people.
how have you gotten home in a snow storm ? how have you made it to the finish line ?
step by step facing your fears and moving forward. i am not afraid of isolation because i already have lived it. in autism one is alone with ones thoughts and fears. i am severely impacted by my intense anxiety and i lose myself in movies and video games.
now the world is living my life. now people are trapped in self imposed quarantine. covid. our days are filled with long hours and we begin a futile search for purpose.
during my examinations of the coronavirus pandemic, i saw a world of pretense fall away, revealing the language of the destruction to come by the scientists and core truth of our human nature and existence. nothing is more powerful than mother nature. i am humbled and making my personal lament to god. today i see true soldiers in the form of doctors and nurses. their bravery is possible path to victory. i am silent however my spirit has trumpeted and triumphed over despair. into the fray we must all go but justice will prevail so do not give up hope dont forget your neighborhood family friends .
cistern of potential has many faces and abilites. having autism has nodes of hypersymmetries. moving order of my experience
is like a continuous translation my intense momenta are conserved in making patterns and calculations probability. dogmatic rules communicate my intentions to mankind nowhere opens the information into expression. I am a prisoner in my own mind. sometimes I master my impulse and arrange myself into action. mom designs careful emergency and pushes me to conversation. I am showing my ascertations. having autism is feeling an infinite well of possibilities.
today I made interesting connection between the generation of sensory states and making statistical analysis. the science of analysis involves sample states and configuration of those states. each set of sample ascribed a probability making a continuous spectrum of states. ive given much thought to the configuration of my sensory states. in suskind's lecture of quantum statistics he describes symmetry in states and conservation of information. the time or interval of existence between states is arbitrary. memory of somatosensory cortex determines discrete configuration of Riemann manifold. how can a topological map be made of sensory states.
domestic global discourse has given us Newtonian science, cancer therapy, and webinars. in our human evolution, we have developed complex ways of thinking about the world around us. people place social order in symbolic management operations modern institutions. markets reflect outlines of our ethos and iniquity. systems created by social stratification cause inequities and economic divide in civil society. increasing political
chaos has cause many divergent social states of human kind. however policies can also generate mans salvation.
climate change recognition demonstrates how policies can be translated from public opinion. my hope
is that we evolve in sophistication and timely manner. social opportunity and equality must be our foundation.
I examine dinosaurs. in bone structure we formulate the function
and characteristics of animals, measurement of social capacity
and interactive intellect. time and evolution cause remarkable
creation of these faculties. in my mental diagram of human evolution I find our structure is similar to dinosaurs in that cartilaginous tailbone exists, however, its shrunken in humans. this is interesting. is there a correlation? the answer maybe yes. opening up further study.
I have been studying biological paleontology. making sense posthumous fossils is a trait treasure hunt. perhaps we are cellular organisms evolving thru stages of complex interactions . it is astounding, through words of our dna an entire language of complex structure is formed. many phyla combined to form the human body . in chosen differentiation of progenitor cells mans faculties were formed. having a mind mitigated by evolution fascinates me. autism, does it have its origins in working manifest of embryo. did something alter my progenitor cells? my ideology does it form ontologically? or does my genotype determine my perspective?
nanoparticle and quantum interactions have made our perception of reality- color, temperature, gravity, sound for example. natural selection caused traits that were obsolete to disappear, maybe a selection of mutations marked my autism.
how has the environment selected increased rate of autism?
careful consideration must be given to our sensory systems,
does our planes of existence rise to the challenge of digressing
environmental contraction? habitation of humanity must be preserved. The continuation of our species comes to bear voice
ode to the beast
in the carbon earth my bonds are decomposing
white bones and mighty flesh
the book of dna rna is transcribed
its interpretation into stone
voice of my generation
laid to rest in diagrams hardened of time
each today orders his own grave
lines and particles of imagination
govern objective reality
forces having bled into interstitial memory
does this destruction ,this annihilation,
program in the ruins of our machines-
a destiny ?
or does the forgotten fossil
record the ode to the beast within?
i feel archeology tells a story. each human enterprise and animal being is governed calcuated by an algorithm. its a simple and complex algorithm, making complexity in creation thru code.
i believe man is not eternal, but our being is outside our perception. god loves our being and understood mans nature and so entrapped the soul for a time to achieve enlightenment. perhaps i voice my being thru my autism.
homeschool please. its every day i sleep, eat, breathe quantum physics. the impossible